My Deconversion Experience

This may sound strange but I actually had, what some may call, a mystical/spiritual experience when I left my faith.

After months of doubt and anguished prayer I decided to go for a walk one evening. As I walked I suddenly blurted out, "I'm an atheist, I'm an a-theist, I don't believe in God". I repeated it a few times, letting it sink in. As I walked my senses seemed to double, time seemed to slow and I became acutely aware of my footsteps, my breath, the leaves rustling in the autumn air. The sky even looked different. As I walked this overwhelming peace and joy came over me. I even did some twirls in the middle of the street! I felt all my doubt, disappointment, and guilt lift away. What a powerful, magical experience it was.

I believe I experienced something similar to what Christian converts feel when they are 'born again', and maybe that's similiar to what Buddhists experience when they shed all of life’s complexities and come to nirvana.